An Old Year , A New Year

I really like end of the year recaps. I read them and think " I had completely forgotten about that happening". That is why I like having lots of pictures and videos of what we do as a family. A little bit of the past saved on paper and plastic can brighten a day or settle an argument.

This time of year is kind of hard for me because it is an undefined area. It feels like a week of flux. The control freak in me wants it to have a concrete purpose. I know I need to learn to relax and not try to fit everything into the compartment it belongs. I learned that in 2010. I am going to refine that learning in 2011. It is what it is. Let God handle it. These are two of my mottos for the new year.

What does God have in store for me this year. I am glad I cannot look ahead and see the pain or loss that waits because each year has a little of that. I am also glad I cannot see the good things in store. That would ruin the surprise and I hate waiting. I am glad that God knows and has it under His control. Sometimes I wish I could erase things from my memory that I don't want to have to think about anymore but you never know when you are going to need a memory. God will use the past to lead you in your future. Now that I have fully entered middle age I have quite a bit to look back on. Some days I take out those memories . I look at what happened and think about the past from the knowledge and the little wisdom I have accumulated . It sometimes looks different in the rear view mirror. I love to look at the videos we have of our grown children when they were little ones. And sometimes I wish I could go back and relive those days...but that is what Grandchildren are for....

Christmas

I have always loved the holidays. They are exciting. Something different is bound to happen that is new and can be remembered for years to come. Memories that can be opened up all year long to brighten a day that is not so special or comfort a heart that is hurting.

Holidays have been very different since we brought our three little boys into our family. These days are difficult for them. When we are looking forward to fun as in the past they are sometimes looking back to pain at the holidays or people they miss. We put up the decortations and celebrate the birth of our Savior and hope that the love we have will seep through the cracks in the walls of pain they live behind.

Money is always a worry around Christmas. Yesterday ,while hanging some holly leaves Zachary had colored and cut out, I was beginning to worry about the mighty little dollar and God told me that if I worried about what I don't have I will certainly miss the parts of Christmas that aren't presents under the tree. Of course He is right. So much of what I love about the Season is not for sale. Watching Christmas movies with the family, baking cookies, helping the little ones to make decorations or gifts, driving out to look at the light displays, decorating the house and watching videos of past Christmas celebrations don't require much if any money and are all part of the fabric of the holidays. The trick is to not let what I don't have or can't do get me down but to enjoy the everyday of Christmas. Maybe someone else reading this will be able to add to my list of what there is to enjoy in this season of His birth. I would love hear how others celebrate.

Dianna Momma in the Handbasket